Once Upon A Mattress

Yesterday was a bust.

If you recall, that cinnamon roll was calling my name.

I tried changing my name to La Tasha.

It didn't work.

So....I ate the damn thing for lunch.

Then we had a frozen pizza for dinner.

And, after marathon concert #2 (which was pretty fabulous, I have to admit)

I rewarded myself with a Culver's cone (the flavor of the day was Peanut butter cup.  I mean, COME ON!  Who in their right mind would pass THAT up?!!)

I also brought home chili cheese fries for Mark.  Not so sure that was a good decision. He thought it was.  I don't wanna talk about it. (I can't tell you how badly I wish I had emoticons on my computer.  I probably do, but am to old and technically inept to know this.)

~

So, I am starting over, yet again, today.

I am not really sure if I can even determine how I am doing so far.

I did get up at 8.  I mixed up some Spark, and toasted half of an oatmeal english muffin. (I never knew there was such a thing until my last venture to the grocery store.)

But, my big mistake was, I brought them back to bed with me, and turned on the TV.

Two "Law and Order SVU" episodes, and a couple "Young and the Restless- 'wow, I really can just start in the middle of the month I have missed, and figure out exactly what is going on" sagas later...and I was exhausted again.  As I was drifting off to sleep, my sister called and my husband brought me an unexpected plate of eggs, toast and hash browns.  My nap would have to wait.

45 minutes later, my furry boys and I were fast asleep.

~

So here is the deal.  It is 3:30pm, and I am finally bathed and ready for the day. (Which is good, considering I have to be at church in one hour.)

The bad part....I am falling into my "rut".  And this rut has nothing to do with mammalian reproduction, thank you very much. ;)

~

I am pretty sure that when I was formed in the womb, the little elves that put me together forgot to include that "get up and go" gene. 

Instead, I got a double dose of the "tired and lethargic" gene.

Or so it would seem anyway.

I am pretty sure a lot of it is self-induced.  If I would just make myself "get up and go" I would probably feel less lethargic, and therefore continue to want to keep going.  However, that whole "getting going" when you feel like all you can muster is the energy to drag your tired butt from the bed to the couch is a tough thing to convince yourself to do.

I find that on the days when I am super lazy (today) and lounge around in bed until 1:30 (today)....this is especially true.

Once you have crossed the point of no return...that magic hour of the day when, if you haven't gotten out of bed and started functioning like a human, rather than a feline, it is all over.  You might as well kiss your whole day good-bye, because there is really nothing that is going to save your from your self-induced coma.

(Unless you are in college..and then, of course, you will magically come back to life around 10 pm, and be ready for another night of mischief and mayhem.)

That is a discussion for another time.

~

Whatever this condition is that I have...I find it most annoying.  It has plagued me since birth, but it has definitely gotten worse with age.  

I am sure the fact that my days are no longer jam-packed has a lot to do with this. Now that I no longer have to be at work by 7:30 am, I have the option of sleeping in.  I have the ability to set my own schedule, and decide how I spend my day.  While I love this freedom, it is also a curse for a person with my personality.  If I were a "type A" person...it would be ideal.  I could create a nice little spreadsheet of what each day would entail.  It would be neatly planned and organized.  Unfortunately, I am "type- artsy-fartsy scatter brained," which means I go out and buy lots of pretty paper and planners to create my ideal schedule....but I can never make a decision as to what I should do on what day. Then, I lose my schedule, and can't remember what I was supposed to do on that day, much less even remember what the heck day it is.  Or, I will wake up with a headache, and that just throws the whole damn schedule off all together, because I can't do anything until I get rid of that darn thing.

Or, I will get distracted by something.  A book, a recipe, something I want to write about..."oh crap!  I forgot to pay the bills!" Stuff like that.

But in all honesty, the true culprit is my bed.

This has been the case for a long time.

In college, I had a heavenly feather bed that I laid on top of my mattress.  It was like sleeping on 4-5 giant down comforters.

THEN, my bff Adam gave me his waterbed.  It was one of those beds with tubes of water...I had never seen one before..but it was fabulous.

I didn't have a bed frame, so we put it right on the floor, and covered it with that feather bed.  O.M.G.

I literally rolled myself out of bed every morning.  I think my friends came to my apartment just to lay on my bed.

~

Fast forward to now.

Whoever invented memory foam is my hero.

My cousin had a memory foam mattress, and I slept in her bed when I was visiting.  That was all it took.  I was hooked.

We have a king size memory foam mattress, topped off with a three inch memory foam pad, topped with super soft sheets, one of those blankets you could swear was made from poor, defenseless bunny fur, (they are SO soft), topped with a down comforter, covered by a nice, heavy linen duvet.  

So, in other words, if you are laying in my bed, you are on top of clouds, while weighted down by angora heaven.

I swear, it is like an invisible force.  I can get out of it just fine...the first time.

But it lures me back in.  If I succumb to it's evil whisperings, forget it.  It has me in it's wicked web, and there is no getting out.

Oh, it looks innocent, all right.  But don't let it fool you.

~

MONDAY.....watch out!

No more of this lazy, lethargic, lounge lizard, loafing around!!

(Alyssa Harlan, that alliteration was just for you!)

No more succumbing to the bed.

Oh no.

I will go where few have gone before me.

I will explore new terrain.

It may be scary....it may be dangerous.  It surely will be taxing.

But no one can stop me now.

Monday, I will MAKE THE BED.

And no one will be allowed back in until after 7pm.

Or whenever I am back in my pj's. ;)

But, it's Sunday.  And I nap on Sundays.  So disregard everything I have written until tomorrow. :)